Lyrics
We are The Fall
Northern white crap that talks back 1
We are not black, tall
No boxes for us 2
Do not fuck us
We are frigid stars 3
We were spitting, we were snapping
"Cop out, cop out!"
As in from heaven 4
Commentary
“The ‘White crap that talks back‘ thing was due to people in London being told that people in the North are thick, or warm, friendly people. A lot of bands masquerade, pretend that they’re the ‘Northern thing’. They don’t expect people like us to come out with what we do. We’re a ‘Manchester’ band, but we’re not The Smirks or Slaughter and The Dogs, spineless bands who just want to get up on that stage. It goes right back to The Hollies, Herman’s Hermits. I mean, nobody takes people like Slaughter and The Dogs seriously: beergut and peroxide and “wock ‘n’ woll” and coming on all mean, ha ha!
“Like Gary Bushell or whoever must have a really hard time interviewing all these bands who have nothing to say. “Wayne stared into space and said, ‘The Fall is the sort of music you play to fridges.’…. ” Ha ha!
“We’ve had white crap in this band: breadheads. I mean, like, everybody screaming “It’s the record companies, it’s the journalists, they’re screwing us.” But it’s not, it’s the fucking musicians! If they withdrew none of that could function. It’s only ‘cos they keep making compromises: they think they’re worth it.
“We’re neither white crap, nor like “We’re talking about Art here, aren’t we?” Witch Trials’ was like a statement of that.”
Mark E. Smith, interviewed by Ian Penman (NME, 5 January 1980, p.7)
“Crap Rap” should be understood as a generic title for a particular thematic (“white crap”/”talks back”) strain of Mark E. Smith’s improvised or semi-improvised introductory spiels at gigs, perhaps stylistically rooted in that early period of The Fall where he was partly modelling himself on Lenny Bruce (see also “Live at the Witch Trials“).
The label “Crap Rap” has been given to a bigger range of introductory statements that I am allowing. So that means that although “Crap Rap” is listed on The Legendary Chaos Tape/Live in London 1980, as “Middle Mass/Crap Rap”, it doesn’t count for my purposes because there’s no sign of the “white crap” lines.
The version of “Crap Rap” on Live at the Witch Trials (1979) is titled “Crap Rap 2” (a second take, perhaps?) and is paired with “Like to Blow” as a single track. For that reason, bzfgt treated them together at annotatedfall.doomby.com. But as with many paired tracks they were not always combined at gigs and so I prefer to deal with them separately.
“Crap Rap 2” is often seen as statement of intent. That’s exactly the phrase both Simon Ford (2003, p.60) and Steve Pringle (2022, p.40) use. Tommy Mackay (2018, p.20) describes it as “the gruppe mission statement”. It’s hard to disagree, although it’s the more obviously straightforward opening two lines that get cited most often: “We are The Fall / Northern white crap that talks back.” MES didn’t always insist on the “northernness” of The Fall.
“Crap Rap” isn’t often found on setlists. There is a notable example, which is from the Greyhound, Croydon, gig on 7 May 1978 (Yvonne Pawlett’s debut). Here it precedes “Industrial Estate” and is listed as “White Crap”.
Canonical List of Crap Raps
The following lists only include Crap Raps that satisfy my criteria. It differs, therefore from what The Fall Online – Gigography and The Track Record currently say.
Click the arrow symbol for the detail.
Official releases
27 October 1979: Bircotes Leisure Centre, Bircotes. Included on ‘Totale’s Turns (It’s Now or Never)’ (1980), titled “Intro”.
We are northern white crap that talks back
We are The Fall
We were spitting, we were stepping
Cop out, cop out
As in from heaven
The difference between you and us is that we have brains
'Cos we're northern white crap, but we talk back
Uh oh, uh oh, uh oh, uh oh, uh oh, uh oh
Bang fucking bang, the mighty fall
The Fall, we are back
We are back
And this next number is Fiery Jack...
“The difference between you and us is that we have brains” has rightly become an oft-quoted MES line.
“Bang fucking bang, the mighty fall” (I’m not capitalising “fall” here in deference to the source, though MES no doubt intends the word to signify the group) is lifted – except for the word “fucking” – from the chorus of B.A. Robertson’s single “Bang Bang” (see genius.com for the lyrics), released in June 1979 and in the UK’s top 100 from 28 July to 13 October. It reached a peak of #2 in the chart for the week from 2 September to 8 September 1979 (see: Official Charts: Bang Bang).
The almost entirely useless genius.com fails to provide any annotations to B.A. Robertson’s song, so I will:
“This expression derives from the Bible. The earliest version in English is found in the Great Bible, Samuel 1:19, 1539:
Oh howe are the myghtie ouerthrowen.
The currently used ‘fallen’ version is found in the King James Version, 1611 and is a demonstration of David’s lament over Saul and Jonathan:
1:19 The beauty of Israel is slain upon thy high places: how are the mighty fallen!”
By Gary Martin, Phrase Finder: “How Are The Mighty Fallen?”.
URL: https://phrases.org.uk/meanings/188450.html (consulted 31/12/2024)
3 November 1979: JB’s, Dudley. Included on the Cherry Red 12 x CD box set, ‘The 1970s’ (2022), disc 12. Titled “Crap Rap/Before the Moon Falls”.
Good evening, we are The Fall
N W C that talks back
You can get wise at half the price
We were stepping, we were spitting
Cop out, cop out
Up here in the north there's no wage-packet jobs for us
Thank Christ
As the junior clergy demand more cash
We spit in their plates and wait for the ice to melt
We are The Fall
Futuristic Aids on long legs
As in from heaven
Perhaps “wise at half the price” is a reference to Alan Wise? See also Middlesbrough, 4 November 1979.
“Futuristic Aids” is probably a reference to Futuristic Aids Ltd. (AKA ‘FAL’), who made sound and lighting equipment such as amps. Perhaps it’s what MES could see in front of him on stage. See Middlesbrough, 4 November 1979 (i.e. the next day). Of course, “FALL” is an acronym of “Futuristic Aids on Long Legs”.
The lines from “Up here in the north there’s no wage-packet jobs for us” to “We spit in their plates and wait for the ice to melt” usually formed the introduction to “Before the Moon Falls”. But sometimes they cropped up elsewhere.
Unofficial live recordings
15 September 1979: Prince of Wales Theatre, YMCA, London. Paired with “Psykick Dancehall”.
We are The Fall
Northern white crap that talks back
We are not Black
We are not female
[ ?? ]
There's no stars in the zone
We stay at home and live on snacks
We are northern white crap that talks back
We are The Fall
Inclues lines (“There’s no stars in the zone / We stay at home and live on snacks”) from “Like To Blow”.
4 November 1979: Rock Garden, Middlesbrough. Paired with “Printhead”.
Futuristic Aids with long legs
Good evening, we are The Fall
Northern white crap, but we talk back
We were spitting, we were stepping
Cop out, cop out
As in from heaven
You can get wise at half the price
Get wise at half the price
We are The Fall
As in from heaven
“Futuristic Aids” is probably a reference to Futuristic Aids Ltd. (AKA ‘FAL’), who made sound and lighting equipment such as amps. See Dudley, 3 November 1979 (i.e. the previous day).
“Get wise at half the price” could be a reference to the legendary promoter/manager Alan Wise. See also Dudley, 3 November 1979.
Influence
Codeine’s debut album, Frigid Stars LP (1991), was titled after the line from “Crap Rap 2”:
The title of Frigid Stars comes from a Mark E Smith lyric. What was your relationship with The Fall?
We all love The Fall! Massive respect. John once told me that their version of “Smile” from the Speed Trials compilation [1989] was the greatest piece of music ever recorded. The Fall had a language we all really enjoyed and agreed on.
Chris Brokaw, interviewed by Jack Milner in Uncut, August 2023.
Footnotes
- As noted in the commentary, the title “White Crap” appeared on at least one setlist. MES also used the phrase “white crap” in the lyrics for “In My Area”, which was the b-side to the Rowche Rumble 7″ (released 30 July 1979). ↩︎
- “No boxes for us” is almost certainly a reference to Adam Ant’s “Antmanifesto”, dated 7 November 1978, which states “there are no boxes for us or our music”. See Maw (1981 p.156):
↩︎ - As mentioned above, “frigid stars” was borrowed by the band Codeine for the title of their 1991 debut album. MES couldn’t claim to be the coiner of the phrase, since other writers used it before him. But that doesn’t mean he necessarily appropriated the phrase. Most other authors have used it poetically in relation to the stars of the night sky; MES may be playing with a double meaning, but “star” is used here in the ‘celebrated performer’ sense. ↩︎
- Some listeners hear this as “acid from heaven”, but I think it is best understood as following on from the first line, “We are The Fall”, as a Biblical allusion. On stage, “We are The Fall, as in from heaven” was sometimes MES’ introductory statement.
The venerable but now outdated The Fall Online-hosted Lyrics Parade had this as “as if from heaven”, which strikes me as a very different theological proposition. annotatedfall.doomby.com had “as in from heaven” from its inception, and it is also what I still hear, live and on record. It also matches what Mark E. Smith wrote on this handwritten gig flyer from 1979 (Source: https://thefall.org/gigography/gig79.html, see entry for 14 December) – although I acknowledge that what is written and what is sung often diverge. But still.
↩︎
Sources / Links
- The Annotated Fall: “Crap Rap 2/Like to Blow” [Archived]
- Ford, Simon (2003). Hip Priest: the story of Mark E Smith and The Fall. London: Quartet Books.
- Mackay, Tommy (2018). 40 Odd Years of The Fall. Place of publication unknown: Greg Moodie.
- Maw, James (1981). The Official Adam Ant Story. London: Futura Macdonald & Co. [Available online in the Internet Archive]
- Milner, Jack (2023). “Q&A: Chris Brokaw: ‘We were learning as we went along’.” Uncut, August, Take 315. p.43.
- Penman, Ian (1980). “All Fall Down.” New Musical Express, 5 January. pp.6-7. [Available online via The Fall Online – Bibliography. Page images or text]
- Pringle, Steve (2022). You Must Get Them All: The Fall on Record. [paperback edition]. Pontefract: Route Publishing Ltd. [Online store]
- The Track Record: “Crap Rap”
- Wikipedia: Bang Bang (BA Robertson song)
- Wikipedia: Frigid Stars LP (Codeine)
Think the “boxes” reference is movie related, nothing to do with Adam, the line is “Tall, no boxes for us”, diminutive movie heroes had to stand on boxes to be taller than their leading ladies (see Alan ladd).Always thought this was the case.
http://killmedeadly.com/apple-boxes.html